I grew up in a Christian home where Jesus's love was evident and shared daily. My family always pointed me to the truth and when they didn't have the answers, I searched until I found a decent answer. The problem with this was that I didn't always look to God's word for the answer, I looked for other people to validate my personal opinion on the issue, rather than deal with some of the hard truths in scripture about certain things. Through this process I learned a few things.
1. I had no idea what side I stood on for certain issues
-Is cussing a sin? How does God feel about drinking? Smoking isn't illegal, but it's bad for you and isn't my body a temple? Doesn't that mean I shouldn't eat a cheeseburger either? Why do people condemn homosexuals more than heterosexuals engaging in pre-marital sex? And isn't pride a sin just as well? What are my opinions on sperm/egg donations? What exactly constitutes salvation? Is predestination a thing? Because wouldn't that mean Jesus didn't die for everyone? --- These questions are tough, and finding my standpoint on them was a rough road. There are still a few (and some not listed here) that I'm struggling to find my completed stance. Growing up I didn't have a firm belief backed by scripture, so whichever opinion of the week I liked, I adopted. This is dangerous ground for a Christian not to know where you stand on big issues, because we will be questioned and looked at in a different light. Because we represent Christ (and do so poorly a lot of the time) we will also be persecuted for our answers, so we might as well give the truth. I am in no way saying we need to have all the answers, BUT on issues that do have room for solidity, we need to at least attempt to figure it out.
2. It's not wrong to seek counsel from older people and/or people who have been through this and have a better understanding of the bible than you.
-BUT in doing this, make sure that they are seeking the Lord and aren't going to give you the answer you want to hear, but give you truth, out of love. It does them (or you) no good to throw answers, or call you out when you're wrong if there is no love or encouragement towards truth. These people may challenge you, but it needs to be gracious and uplifting. Otherwise the person looking for advice will be unsettled and feel stupid for asking questions in the first place.
3. God's word cannot be added to or taken away from.
-This means read God's word for what it says, don't try to add to it or take away the context of the scripture. This is where seeking wisdom from the Holy Spirit comes in to ask for discernment. There are some things in the Bible that are unsettling to new and seasoned Christians, but that doesn't mean we can skip those parts. If you have trouble understanding or grasping, see point 2.
4. It is okay to question pastors and teachers.
-I know this may interfere with point number 2 but hear me out. A good pastor should always ask you to take what he says and refer back to scripture and never take what he says as absolute truth. Although they are seeking the wisdom from the Lord to teach you, they are not always correct. Make sure they are backing their teaching up with sound scripture and focusing on the GOSPEL (Jesus's life and mission) and preach Grace. I can't tell you how many times I've seen pastors teach about truth and God's wrath and completely miss grace and mercy. You need both, because God is both.
5. Try not to let the job of questioning everything turn you into a cynic or critic.
-It seems that all anyone is this day is outspoken, quick to respond (most of the time without thinking) and cynical. The cynical side of things then quickly turns into apathy because people just don't want to deal with it, or they become so opinionated (i'm sorry "knowledgable") that they leave no room for the Holy Spirit to convict or teach because they have already formulated opinions and that's that. (I speak mainly to Christians here because I cannot expect those who have not submitted to the same authority I have to operate under these principles we are called to). This may be hard, but I believe it is so true:
It's easy to sit in a church service and tear apart every aspect that does that work for you specifically. I struggled through this a few years ago when I was 20 because I felt I had been enlightened to the true aspect of "church" and America had it all wrong. It was similar across the south (I grew up in the bible belt so I do not profess to have mass amounts of experience across the world), you show up to church, get your bulletin with the upcoming events. Music starts, sing three songs (1st-fast song, get the congregation going!! 2nd-medium speed, engage the congregation more towards Jesus. 3rd-super slow and reflective to really bring it home), Pastor teaches for about 30 minutes and makes comments about how he won't keep you from the football game (or lunch) this afternoon, sing a closing song after the offering and then you're dismissed. The church I had read about in ACTS definitely didn't sound like American church. Yet in my angst and 20 year old mindset to 'fix the church' one pulpit at a time, I felt this overwhelming conviction against the way I viewed the church in the first place. I had become an awful critic because church didn't fit MY idea of what it was supposed to look like. God revealed that the church is not about pleasing me or fitting into my mold of what church was. The church is meant to edify, encourage, challenge and worship God through multiple facets of service. Changing my lens, I was able to see how even though we may not have all the answers, God works despite us and still moves to accomplish the things He intends to. I say this so that in your quest to think for yourself and understand what you really believe in, don't let it consume you to the point that you are critical of everything and become hard to any teaching at all.
6. Pray for wisdom and discernment. (James 1:5-8)
-I cannot express enough how much this matters. We do live in a world where deceit and grey lines are everywhere and it's easy to be fooled. In the quest to think for yourself and discover what the Bible really says about certain issues, please remember that you are not wise apart from the Lord and what He wants you to understand. Some things will never make sense, but because He has shown us time and time again that He has our best in mind (Jer 29:11/Rom. 8:28) I feel it makes more sense to trust that He has my back, than beg Him to explain things. In this I continually ask for discernment and maybe I do pray for answers but when He is silent or when I cannot understand why something has happened, that is when I must have faith (Hew 11:1). This may not be good enough for some people because they can't accept that God should keep anything from us, "but that is why we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but what is unseen" (2 cor. 4:18).
I say all this to make you think. Don't make the mistake of reading anything online, in a book (apart from the bible), listen to a sermon or talk with a friend and take their knowledge or opinion and automatically deem it as truth BEFORE you take it to God's word and challenge it. And like James says "If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask for it" (Jam 1:5). Start using your brain God gave you, and ask Him what is right and what needs to be revisited. Start thinking for yourself
*meg
Mean What You Say - Sent By Ravens
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